


Soulbreak

by Haetae (orphan_account)



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Soldier Enhancement Program, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-03
Updated: 2018-06-03
Packaged: 2019-05-17 19:50:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14838092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Haetae
Summary: Jack knows that he’s hurting Gabe. And part of him, the primal, bonded part that tells him to be within a five foot vicinity at all times, the part that demands they cuddle at three in the morning, is breaking because of it.





	1. Chapter 1

Jack hasn’t spoken to Gabe in three weeks. 

Three weeks- god- has it really been that long? 

Part of Jack aches at the thought, and wants nothing more than to run back into his soulmate’s arms. Back into his other half, if nothing else his best friend. 

Fear stops him. 

It’s been there as long as he can remember, but objectively he thinks it started at about three years old. 

It almost hurts to remember, the quiet screams, and the nights where they both left. It almost hurts to think about the times that his father returned from “work” with an empty bottle and a temper. It almost hurts to recall the day that his mother left the house, and never came back. 

_Almost._

But almost, no matter how far in the past, leaves a mark, and the fear that one day Jack would be the one that was left behind, that Jack could become the mangled body slouched in the road, was mark enough for him to push everyone away. If he wasn’t close to anyone, he thought, no one could hurt him.

There were two problems with pushing people away, though. 

The first, was that it was lonely. If Jack had a dollar for every night he had spent alone in his room, thinking, or every empty slot in his contact list, he would have had much more to drink. 

The second, was that people noticed eventually. 

-

The first time that someone took interest in the “mysterious golden boy” was in the Soldier Enhancement Program. Jack had signed some paper, been branded with a “76”, and then promptly returned to his room. The next day, 58 (Julan Avers, but they weren’t supposed to know that yet) took it upon himself to follow Jack around, trying to weasel more than a word or two out of the new recruit. That attracted attention, which in turn attracted more and more fuss about who Jack was and _"what exactly was his problem, man?"_. Once, another soldier had tried to follow Jack to training, figuring that if the others saw his coldness, that he would be forced to respond.  
He didn’t sustain any permanent injuries, but it was enough to put a stop to the unwanted questions. 

When the recruits had gotten squad assignments, Jack had been reading tactic books containing information about the Omnics he might encounter in the field. He had already read it, of course, but Jack figured that it didn’t hurt to brush up every now and then. After the comm alert pulled him out of his reading, Jack had stalled, slowly cleaning up the books as if it would help him avoid the looming threat of social interaction. When Jack reached the meeting room, he wished that he had taken longer. 

At first, everything had been normal. The quiet hum of conversation was regular, and the list for the teams had been posted on the wall. Then, as he was scanning the room, Jack felt a burn. 

It wasn’t unpleasant, it was more of a warmth, a small fire lighting in his chest. Jack let out a quiet noise of surprise as he looked up, meeting brown eyes as someone made their way towards him. He felt a tug, and stood, still and shaking as a thin, gold line stretched from his chest to the stranger’s. 

Jack ran.

He knows _now_ that he shouldn’t have, he knows that it probably confused the person on the other end of the line, but at the time, the only thing that Jack was thinking was _“this can’t be happening.”_

_No._

_This isn’t real._

He skidded, panting, into the weapons room, slamming the door shut and looking frantically around for something to distract him from what had just happened. In a spastic frenzy, Jack grabbed a pulse rifle, fell onto the ground, and started to take it apart. 

“Know your weapon” was what the commanders had said, and so Jack had taken it upon himself to do just that, perfecting the art of disassembling and reassembling the large gun within a few days. While it had seemed to be useless knowledge then became his saviour as he neatly stacked the loose parts into neat rows. His shaking hands stilled as he clicked the small pieces back together. 

Jack didn’t know how long he had sat there, twiddling with the pieces of metal until they formed the familiar shape of the rifle. But by the time that he had finished, he was calm again, and ready to create a way to deal with the situation. 

Slow clapping filled the large room, and Jack twisted his head back towards the entrance to locate the source of the noise. 

_Brown eyes._

The fire in his chest returned, and Jack backed up against the wall. 

_Brown eyes._

The figure moved towards him, a hand outstretched as if to try and comfort the other man. 

_Brown eyes._

“Hey.” The intruder said, with a deep voice that made Jack’s heart race. “I’m Gabriel.”

\- 

Reliving their first meeting made Jack’s chest constrict, and before he could stop himself he was crying. God, he was a terrible person, wasn’t he? He had been so wrapped up in himself, in his fear, that he hadn’t thought to talk to the person on the other end of the golden line. He hadn’t thought to look past the smiles, and the small touches, and the subtle ways that Gabe - his soul mate - showed affection. He just wasn’t thinking. 

As he thought about it, Jack finally allowed himself to admit what he was so scared of. 

He _loved Gabriel Reyes._

And it scared him to death. 

_What would happen if they fell out?_

__

_If Gabe decided that he didn’t need Jack anymore?_

__

_If Jack wasn’t good enough?_

__

_Would they become like his parents?_

Jesus- Jack didn’t want them to end up like his parents. The thought of them arguing- of he and Gabe yelling like they did, leaving like they did, made him sick. 

Torn. 

Jack wanted Gabe, he did. It was a want that ran down through his bones, through the very fibre of his being. The fear- the fear was stupid, wasn’t it? Not every couple ended up like Jack’s parents. And it was rare to find one’s soul mate, shouldn’t he count himself lucky? Shouldn’t he try? 

Jack’s inner voices faded away, and it left him feeling empty inside. 

_Try._

He sighed, rubbed his eyes, and picked up his comm. 

For Gabe, he would try.


	2. Zurich

_This wasn’t how it was supposed to end. With yelling, and screaming, and punching walls, and tears. It was never meant to get this far. Letting Jack take the position…_

It was an obvious choice, Gabe knew, between the lives of the innocent- the lives of the people who they had fought to save- and the life of their relationship. Part of Gabe had hoped, though, that Jack would step down, and they could retire, and life happily ever after. 

It wasn’t a disappointment, when Jack kept going, but it did hurt. 

The pain grew over time, and as the weeks and months and years went by, it manifested into anger. 

Anger at Overwatch

Anger at Jack. 

The second the bomb went off, Gabe regretted everything. 

Sitting in the rubble, Gabe had felt the bond twinge. It jerked, trembled, and seemed to pull Gabe until he got up, until he was running, without any idea where he was going. He feet moved without him, which was a good thing, because his head was full of regret and worry.

The argument. _This was all his fault._ He had forgotten, in the heat of the moment, the night in Numbani when he had woken up to Jack crying. When Jack had told him about his parents, about his fear. 

He had forgotten about the night he promised that he would let Jack go, that he would keep him safe, never hurt him. 

But that was what he had been doing, hadn’t he? Hurting Jack. Turning him- them- into his own personal nightmare. How many times had their arguments triggered the nightmares that Gabe knew followed Jack like a shadow? How many times had he left in the middle of the night, sitting on the roof, wondering when things would get better? 

Gabriel stood, and in a moment shed all of the ignorance, all of the cruel words, and the cold stares, and the harsh "Commander Reyes"s that had stuck to him like a glove. Because Jack hadn't been completely innocent either. 

He was jerked out of his thoughts as he heard a strained cry from under a pile of concrete and ash. 

_A tuft of golden hair, a flash of blue eyes._

“Jack!” 

_Sorry, I’m so sorry Jack, just be alive, I’ll make it all better if you just stay alive…_

There was a cough- and if someone had been close enough they might have heard the words whispered from underneath the rubble.

There was a sob- and if someone had, indeed, been watching, they would have turned away.

Then there was silence- and two broken souls, lost in the ruins of what they had built together.


End file.
